Farm and Garden Jokes
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What did the doctor remove from her salad? Kidney beans!
Why do worms act so frightened? They have no backbone.
What is an ant? A hard-working bug that still finds time to go to lots of picnics.
Why do you have to be careful about telling a secret in a cornfield? Because the corn have ears.
How do you make a pineapple turnover? Try tickling its stomach.
What most looks like half of a watermelon? The other half.
Why does a farmer have to wear dark sunglasses? Because she grows sunflowers.
Why are fruits so polite? They always remember to say “Thank you ‘berry’ much!”
What could be called “nature’s pincushion”? A cactus.
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the salad dressing.
What fruit is not afraid to take a swim? A watermelon.
How do you make friends with a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
What tree is like a pet? A dogwood.
Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Berry! Berry who? Berry nice to meet you!
What do you call a shoe made from a banana? A slipper.
What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Stop picking on me!
What kind of vegetable likes to look at animals? A zoo-chini!
What is a zucchini's favorite game? Squash!
What's the coolest vegetable? A rad-ish!
What do vegetables wish for, more than anything else in the whole world? Peas (peace) on earth!
Why do vegetables want that so much? Because it will give them peas (piece) of mind!
What's a dancer's favorite kind of vegetable? Spin-ach!
What's the most uncomfortable kind of vegetable? Spin-ouch!
Why do cabbages win at races? Because they know how to get a-head!
What is a taxi driver's favorite kind of vegetable? A Cab-bage!
What does corn say when it feels embarrassed? "Aw, shucks!"
What is a chicken's favorite kind of vegetable? An egg-plant!
What is a kayaker's favorite kind of lettuce? Row-maine!
What did the salad greens say to the hungry kid? We'll make your mouth and your tummy happy, if you lettuce (let us)!
How did the new gardeners learn gardening? By trowel and error!
What was the name of the gardener's favorite TV show? Lawn and Order!
How do trees access the internet? They log on!
Why did the carrot get embarrassed? Because it saw a chick-pea!
Why do gardeners plant bulbs? So that the worms can see where they are going!
What vegetables are a sailors nightmare? Leeks!
What do you call a cheerleading herb? An encourage mint!
Jokes contributed by our staff and adapted from Ready, Set, Grow! A Kid’s Guide to Gardening by Rebecca SpohnAnd find more at the Wisconsin School Garden Network's Joke of the Month Page. and here is another big list found via a google search.